1. Assuming: Sure, we know when you Assume you make an ass out of you and me but do you really think that applies to a marriage forged and sanctified by angels? Sure it does! If you think your partner is upset, ask. If you think your partner does not understand what you said, ask. If you did not understand what your partner said, ask. If you want something, ask directly. Sure, it’s nice when your partner anticipates your needs but you will be sorely disappointed when they miss your next whim.

2. It’s a couple, not a gang: Many people make the mistake of letting other people into their relationship. Whether it’s letting Mom give her two cents on what kind of guy/girl you married or bringing in another sex partner or letting your friends talk smack about your partner, it is incredibly unhealthy. You are a couple. If you are weak enough to require that other’s tell you how you feel about someone, then you should not be married. Marriage is for independent people who can make up their own minds. All others need not apply.

3. Talking too little: Sometimes we get upset. Sometimes our feelings are hurt. Even in the most loving relationships this happens. If we do not speak up, our partners can and will repeat the offense. Silence is usually taken as acquiescence. CoupleDumb goes by the motto: ‘If we don’t teach em’ they won’t learn nuthin’.  Teaching them is the same as creating a boundary. Try not to accuse them but speak from power.  ‘When you _________, I felt __________.’ Request that they not do that again.